I am only a few weeks into my third trimester, but so far the first trimester was the hardest for me. Thankfully, I was not terribly sick and I never actually threw up. However, I did deal with morning sickness and fatigue for about six weeks. It could have been so much worse, but when I was in the middle of it I thought it was pretty bad.
The strangest part to me was that I could not stand even the thought of foods I had been eating regularly for so long. I used to eat oatmeal for breakfast every morning, but even the smell of it made me nauseous. I didn’t want to eat beans or cabbage, or anything else with a strong smell or taste.
My wonderful husband brought me juice and crackers in bed every morning when I woke up (and I began sleeping much later than the 5:00 mornings I was used to), and that would usually curb my nausea enough to get up and putter around a bit. Sam would also cook me eggs for breakfast every morning, and he also got used to cooking his own food pretty often. I still tried to cook him beans and chop his cabbage, but often I would do it in the biggest batches I could and put them in the refrigerator for him to fix for himself the rest of the way.
I lived on eggs, toast, potatoes, and yogurt, and I ended up losing a few pounds during the first trimester.
In addition to the sickness, I also struggled a lot with discouragement during the first several weeks. I went from running with Sam every single day (typically six miles a day) to sitting in the apartment all day. This was in January/February and it was very cold outside, often with snow, which discouraged me even more from getting out.
As I mentioned in my previous post, I was still terrified about becoming a mother and our future plans in Romania. Quite often I was sad and mopey, feeling sorry for myself that I was feeling sick and cooped up inside, and being overall quite selfish. I know it was discouraging and hard for Sam, but he was extremely kind and encouraging through it all. He sympathized with my sickness, cooked and cleaned for me, and constantly thanked me for carrying our child.
Looking back now, I wish I had been much more positive and thankful for my many blessings despite my small hardships. I wish I had been more attentive and loving to Sam instead of feeling sorry for myself.
Now I am immensely thankful for all the mornings I feel well and the afternoons I feel energized. I am so thankful for my wonderful, thoughtful husband who constantly sacrifices so much for me. And I pray I will take heed to the lessons I am learning looking back on that time and if I go through that again (and I pray that I will someday!), that I will have a better attitude and always be thankful and aware of my blessings.
Even when I physically feel bad or I am discouraged, being pregnant and anticipating our child has been and is such a blessing!
It was such a blessing when I transitioned to the second trimester and began progressively feeling better and better.
One day I woke up and I did not feel quite so nauseous. Each day after that I began feeling better and better, and I even began cooking breakfast for Sam because I felt well enough to get out of bed and prepare his coffee and oatmeal.
I began running again, just a few exhausting miles at a time, but I was thrilled to be running again. I also began walking much more regularly, and I finally started going to the store by myself, which gave me a boost and a feeling of independence.
I was suddenly surprised at how hungry I was all the time, and I almost didn’t care what food it was! I went back to eating almost normally for me (although it still took me a while to want coffee again), and I was eating all the time. It took me a little while to catch up I guess, but I did start gaining weight.
I was so happy to be feeling better, but of course, I still found something to be discontent about. I just wanted to look pregnant! I could not wait to have a real bump, or to feel the baby move. People were still so surprised when I told them I was pregnant, and several people even told me they never would have guessed by looking at me. I could see my stomach growing and feel myself changing, but it still wasn’t quite noticeable to others. I would ask Sam all the time if he could see my bump, and I wondered when I might need maternity clothes.
When my family came to visit I was 23 weeks. I was wearing a large, flowy dress when they first saw me, and when I asked them if I looked pregnant they politely said “yes, kind of.” However, it did not take long for me to actually start showing after that. A few days later when I was wearing maternity pants Mama had brought me and a smaller maternity top Mama said, “Oh my, you look pregnant!”
I was about 18 weeks when I first felt the baby move, and it still excites me even now every time I feel a kick.
Pregnancy continues to be such a blessing and I am so thankful for this sweet, fleeting time.